The Best Vacation Ever!
Friday, May 18, 2012
Six things not to say to someone with diabetes
"Should you be eating that?"
People living with diabetes are painfully familiar with the "Diabetes Police," those well-meaning friends, family members and strangers who might point out weight gain, drop hints about exercising more or relentlessly push sugar-free foods, even though both Type 1 and Type 2 diabetics can eat sugar.
So if you don’t have diabetes but know someone who does, remember the following six comments can be insulting.
•"Can you/should you eat that?"
•"Do you have BAD diabetes?"
•"If you'd just exercise…" or "If you'd just eat better…" (While no one wants to be blamed for causing their illness, Type I diabetes is an autoimmune disorder, unrelated to diet and exercise.)
•"You don't look like a diabetic!"
•"My grandfather had that and he lost his leg."
•"I could never do that." (Inject insulin.)
People living with diabetes are painfully familiar with the "Diabetes Police," those well-meaning friends, family members and strangers who might point out weight gain, drop hints about exercising more or relentlessly push sugar-free foods, even though both Type 1 and Type 2 diabetics can eat sugar.
So if you don’t have diabetes but know someone who does, remember the following six comments can be insulting.
•"Can you/should you eat that?"
•"Do you have BAD diabetes?"
•"If you'd just exercise…" or "If you'd just eat better…" (While no one wants to be blamed for causing their illness, Type I diabetes is an autoimmune disorder, unrelated to diet and exercise.)
•"You don't look like a diabetic!"
•"My grandfather had that and he lost his leg."
•"I could never do that." (Inject insulin.)
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Monday, May 7, 2012
Father Daughter Hit The Pump
While I've raised her with tons of love and nurturing care, I never treated her with princess gloves, fearing that would hold her back. I'm a father who wants his daughter to kick-ass on her own strengths, rather than wait for a man to take care of her. (Note to Ann Coulter: I have nothing against men and women coupling up. Lord knows I'd love some feminine energy and regular sex in my life. I just want my daughter to know she can take care of herself.)
My ex has a similar attitude – that our daughter is better off if she’s confident enough to fend for herself. (My ex is someone else who kicks ass in that department.)
This means now that my daughter is driving, she doesn't turn to mom or dad for gas. She’s a responsible teen who buys her own fuel at the pump. Right?
By the time I was driving as a teenage boy, I had a fast-food service-industry job that gave me money for gas, movies, and cheap dinners out with my girlfriend. I never asked for hand-outs from my father or mother. (Okay, when I was down to my last dollar.)
My daughter knows this. So when we hit the gas pump in her hand-me-down car the other day, she pulled out her gas card, pronto.
“How low is your tank?” I asked.
“It’s pretty much empty,” she said.
“And how much money is on your gas card?”
“Six dollars.”
That would buy her a few gallons. Sheesh. She’s got plenty of time in life to learn to be self-reliant. I filled her tank on my credit card.
Sometimes a father’s daughter really is daddy’s little girl.
Saturday, May 5, 2012
Friday, May 4, 2012
Don’t be that guy: Mr. Point-N-Shoot
They also are the only ones who believe sending pictures of their penis is a completely appropriate dating strategy.
I’m not sure if I was too hungover for class that morning or simply glossed too quickly over the reading assignment but nowhere in the Dating Manual do I recall that sending text message photos of your junk is a fitting method for telling a woman you’re interested.
Several years ago Polly and I were out with her girlfriends. After a few drinks the conversation, as it usually does with women, turned to sex. In a moment of intoxicated one-upmanship the youngest among them decided to show everybody else a recent text she was sent from one of her numerous suitors. Personally, I would have appreciated an advanced warning.
Somewhere along the way this dude decided he ought to take things to another level and prove to this girl how interested he really was. So with a determination that was admirable he pulled out all of the stops – quite literally. On her phone screen was a picture of dude’s manly essence in all its vertical glory along with the caption that read…
“thinking about you!”
Dude. Really?!?!
Now I get that sexting is all the rage for teenagers and college kids, but this guy was almost 50! Couldn’t he have just taken her out for a nice steak dinner, blooming onion, maybe a movie then ask if she wanted to come in for a night cap? Was the anatomy lesson truly necessary? And how did he hope she would respond, did he think she would be overcome with passion at the sight and head (no pun intended) right over? I have my own and frankly they aren’t that captivating.
And what if he had mistakenly sent it to his boss or God forbid his mother? I once sent a cute G-Rated “I love you, baby” text message, meant for the Polly, to my next-door neighbor’s wife and was mortified for three days. I also found myself in the stall of a women’s bathroom at Ontario airport once and barely escaped without getting arrested, so don’t tell me that could never happen. And isn’t sending a picture of your twig and berries over 3G just asking for it to blow up in your face someday? Does AT&T or Verizon keep a file of dude’s packages just in case one of them ends up in political office? And what if you and her don’t work out, you get caught cheating with the roommate, or accidentally call her by your ex’s name? Guess what, because you wanted be Ron Jeremy now your package is the laughing stock at GNO’s everywhere.
Andrew Weiner, that’s all I’m saying.
Besides is an 8-megapixel photo how you really want to introduce the goods? Everybody knows that cameras make objects appear smaller than they really are and you’ll probably just end up disappointing her with your manliness and blow your chances entirely. So at least wait until she’s seen it in person before giving her something to frame and put on the mantle. Or better yet save the picture taking for your six-year-old niece’s birthday party or that 6’2″ transvestite in line at Starbucks and leave the home-made porn for some other loser.
In other words, don’t be that guy.
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
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