Google Me

daddy I’m a hooker.





All things are spelled and grammerized as they were in the Google search.


If you blog, chances are you pop up in some pretty weird searches. Now imagine what you pop up in when you have the word, “Sex” in the blog title. Then imagine also having the word, “Dad” in the title. I’ll be straight with you. There’s some sick shit that people search for at night. The majority of it comes from Eastern Europe and the Middle East, though I do get my fair share of scary ones from Georgia, Alabama and Arkansas.
What you see listed below is a weekend’s worth of Google searches. This past weekend, to be specific. This is how people occupied their time between noon on Friday and 9:47 AM on Sunday. Go ahead and assume that the big winners were anything that had any or all of the following words, in various (and shocking) combinations: Sex, dad, daughter, father. Most added the words, “And”, or, “With” in their searches. Hidden amongst the weird ones are some really funny ones. Enjoy.

amy grant. Daddy sex. blink 182 nurse. sex with sex doctor sex. sex dad. sex with dad. i love boobs. enema. Dedy sex. soccer. prety breasts. white trash backyard. drunk woman. drunk old lady. I’m on my period. Sofia vergara nipple. world’s best breast. handjob. German chick. father daughter sex. kotex. Buddy Jesus. Amy Grant whore. yashi guzel sex. pizza al davis. red forman. heather locklear no panties. Chris daughtry. Raiders black hole. Miller Lite man card. mexicanhookers. plump bikini. hookers dad sex. daughter naked stories. getting down. hot nurses. old hottie hottie. fantasy sex. picture with cool baby. Jack Daniels. sex in cabo. salma hayek ass. archer sex. enema of the state. Mexican hookers. Motel 6 sucks tits.
That gets us through Friday night. Tomorrow is a new day.
dad sex. Archer sex. man card. getting laid cabo. Cabo sex. where to get laid in cabo. Josie Stevens tits. sex with daddy. white trash dip. virgin at 37. man card revoke. South Dakota. find prostitutes in cabo. aunt flo. Dropkick murphys. Daddy phone sex. Dick Booster. black hole. soccer. cavity search. daddy I’m a hooker. single dad double standard. daddy needs to bone. NFL breast cancer gloves. Iraq sex. 12 hot dads. spuds mckenzie. bald is beautiful. sexy nurses. Blink enema.

All told, there were upwards of 100 searches that referenced having sex with one’s own father. As mentioned above, the vast majority came from India, Pakistan, Nepal, Greece, Poland, Slovakia, Italy, Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Georgia, Alabama and Arkansas. Occasionally from Canada. Mainly the plains provinces. Must be something about being home alone on those cold winter nights.
“daddy I’m a hooker”, came from a New York City suburb. What a shock. I hope she (or he) found something more helpful than my blog. And that daddy didn’t have a stroke when little Cindy or Bobby dropped the news that they’re a prostitute.
I want to hear from you. What’s the weirdest or funniest search have you had for your blog? Have you searched for something you thought was very PG, but Google led you to places that were more XXX? Which of these were your favorites? Tell me about it.